


You Will Manage Somehow

by OhTigridia



Series: Gekkagumi Week [3]
Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Acceptance, Gen, Introspection, No one dies but August kind of accepts that he is probably going to die?, Past Memories, Reflection, Set around the time after July’s threat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:40:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27966197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OhTigridia/pseuds/OhTigridia
Summary: Poison spilt down the sink, the bottle capped and put away, at least August can hope this is enough to protect them.It’s only at this point, when things are laid out into place, that August addresses himself. His own life as a person. His own right to live, that he is more than willing to sacrifice for the younger two, no matter how unfair it sometimes feels.Written for Gekkagumi Week Day 6Prompts: August, Nostalgia, Death
Relationships: August & July, August & Mikage Hisoka & Utsuki Chikage
Series: Gekkagumi Week [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2044090
Kudos: 13





	You Will Manage Somehow

**Author's Note:**

> Thought about August changing the bottles of poison with the refusal of July’s offer on his mind, and what it might mean for him.

At 4:00am, the world sleeps while August watches the glow of the moon from his lab. The waxing gibbous phase, he notes, almost blooming into a full moon. It illuminates the rest of the sky in its overpowering glory. 

August admires the moon, though it is strange how it reminds him of someone. Someone so bright - so graceful and purposeful, yet someone who cannot glow without stealing the light from others. Someone, who in turn, follows the way the moon only reflects light taken from the sun.

Strange for August to think of him that way, though perhaps it was his own fault for wearing those earrings all the time. Perhaps, if July did not wish to be viewed as the moonlight, then perhaps he shouldn’t wear them at all.

Maybe he does want to be seen that way though. A crescent moon, slowly growing in power, until he becomes something quite frightening.

Is that how things are now? Is it that August has grown to fear the way July turned out to be? 

Surely not. They are both men. They can both handle their own selves - August is quite sure of that.

It is of course, why he declined his offer. Cheap life isn’t worth living, August thinks. He’d much rather take what little power he still has, than simply submit and give up. If July wishes to kill him for what he’s done, then August would rather at least make use of this project he’s devoted his life to. He’d rather die at the hands of an old friend, hoping it can save his family, than simply abandon it all, and rot the rest of his days away in the organisation, his work never bearing fruit. 

He shakes his head, brushes his hair out of his eyes. This isn’t what August wishes to think of currently, though perhaps it is inevitable his mind should drift. He’s restless, running on an anxiety induced lack of sleep. It’s only at hours like these that it is possible to be completely alone from April and December, and even then, it’s difficult to discern whether April will wake up in the night, notice his disappearance, and scold him for overworking himself again. 

_Ironic, when he thinks of April._

April, who will watch August work in his lab for a week without sleep, and will be sure to tell him off, though August knows he’s practically doing the same thing. 

A workaholic, April once called him, and August had in turn laughed, and shut the laptop on his fingers. 

At least August can still grin after a week of no sleep. April on the other hand is moody as ever, August would tease. He’d attack his hair, ruffling it in his old way that would only make April more irritated, though it’s old jokes, the same as they were a decade ago.

At the end of the day he’d relent. There’d be a peace agreement, something along the lines of “I’ll try and get eight hours tonight if you will,” and they’d shake hands on that. No more documents for a while. No more science, because, “You always come out of there smelling like smoke and chemicals. It’s disgusting.”

Tonight, there’s nothing the organisation wants from them, so let them be family for a while.   
  


_Family…_

August tips the liquid from April’s bottle into the lab sink, rinses it, and replaces it with a new liquid. Something to keep his family safe, rather than kill all he cares about. 

He examines the bottle as he corks it tight, staring at his distorted reflection in the glass. 

He looks so tired that it’s almost funny. Faded eyes with dark circles underneath. The side effects of this dull insomnia. It’s something that December must find disturbing. How the other two members of his family barely sleep at all, whereas August is fairly certain December has never experienced a sleepless night in his life.

It’s something August is oddly grateful for though, because December looks so peaceful when he sleeps. The organisation becomes increasingly difficult for August to deal with, but at least he can return home to the fragile domesticity of family.

April cooks on the stove so August doesn’t have to wrangle with it again. The smell of curry hits his senses, as April says “Welcome home,” with the slight of a smile.

He lets him sit on the couch and close his eyes for a while. December moves naturally in his sleep to curl up against his lap, the same as it always is.

Like home. 

The sound of laptop keys tapping, the smell of spice on the stove, the taste of sweets and gingerbread, even the soft of December’s sleeping breaths are just _home_.

So August has to protect them, because they can’t protect themselves. Not from this at least. It’s his responsibility to keep things stable.

Poison spilt down the sink, the bottle capped and put away, at least August can hope this is enough to protect them. 

It’s only at this point, when things are laid out into place, that August addresses himself. His own life as a person. His own right to live, that he is more than willing to sacrifice for the younger two, no matter how unfair it sometimes feels.

August thinks of them again, how much they’ve grown in the years they’ve known each other.

August wasn’t old enough for the responsibility of two kids younger than him, but nevertheless he did it, because he thought they’d never survive if he didn’t. August took pity on everything - silly as it was for a spy of all things.

Back then they had youthful dreams that were already ruled out as ridiculous by circumstances of their childhood, but still...

If they can forget about August, they can live lives of their own. They can grow old. Do whatever they dream of. They can have a proper family that didn’t force them to weaponize themselves in order to survive.

Maybe once, August’s own dream was to escape. Take them with him, and dream of stupid things, like watching them get proper jobs, get married, do all the mundane things families do, but not anymore.

August already got his wish he wrote that day. 

“A happy family,” no matter how long for.


End file.
